The Humble Libertarian

Mind your business.



Saturday, January 17, 2009

Bushisms: George W. Bush's Funny Quotes and Gaffes

With President George W. Bush on the way out, it's time for us to exercise one of my favorite freedoms as an American, the freedom to make fun of our own leaders, even our President. From the beginning, Bush wasn't known for his sparkling oratory skills. Here's a list of hilarious Bush gaffes and quotes:

Here's a video clip of President Bush saying, among other things, the following quotes:

"Our enemies are innovative and resourceful, and so are we. They never stop thinking about new ways to harm our country and our people, and neither do we." -Washington, D.C., Aug. 5, 2004

"Tribal sovereignty means that; it's sovereign. I mean, you're a -- you've been given sovereignty, and you're viewed as a sovereign entity. And therefore the relationship between the federal government and tribes is one between sovereign entities." -Washington, D.C., Aug. 6, 2004

"I hear there's rumors on the Internets that we're going to have a draft." -presidential debate, St. Louis, Mo., Oct. 8, 2004"

"I know the human being and fish can coexist peacefully." -Saginaw, Mich., Sept. 29, 2000

"Families is where our nation finds hope, where wings take dream." -LaCrosse, Wis., Oct. 18, 2000

"They misunderestimated me." -Bentonville, Ark., Nov. 6, 2000

"I know how hard it is for you to put food on your family." -Greater Nashua, N.H., Chamber of Commerce, Jan. 27, 2000

"I'm the decider, and I decide what is best." -Washington, D.C. April 18, 2006

"There's an old saying in Tennessee -- I know it's in Texas, probably in Tennessee -- that says, fool me once, shame on --shame on you. Fool me -- you can't get fooled again." -Nashville, Tenn., Sept. 17, 2002

It's followed by commentary on whether Bush is actually an "idiot" or just inarticulate.



Here are other Bush quotes that might raise an eyebrow:

You know, one of the hardest parts of my job is to connect Iraq to the war on terror." -interview with CBS News' Katie Couric, Sept. 6, 2006

"The same folks that are bombing innocent people in Iraq were the ones who attacked us in America on September the 11th." -Washington, D.C., July 12, 2007

"I'm the commander -- see, I don't need to explain -- I do not need to explain why I say things. That's the interesting thing about being president." -as quoted in Bob Woodward's Bush at War

"Oh, no, we're not going to have any casualties." -discussing the Iraq war with Christian Coalition founder Pat Robertson in 2003, as quoted by Robertson

"I would say the best moment of all was when I caught a 7.5 pound largemouth bass in my lake." -on his best moment in office, interview with the German newspaper Bild am Sonntag, May 7, 2006

"For every fatal shooting, there were roughly three non-fatal shootings. And, folks, this is unacceptable in America. It's just unacceptable. And we're going to do something about it." -Philadelphia, Penn., May 14, 2001

"This is an impressive crowd -- the haves and the have mores. Some people call you the elite -- I call you my base." -at the 2000 Al Smith dinner

"I know what I believe. I will continue to articulate what I believe and what I believe -- I believe what I believe is right." -Rome, Italy, July 22, 2001

"See, in my line of work you got to keep repeating things over and over and over again for the truth to sink in, to kind of catapult the propaganda." -Greece, N.Y., May 24, 2005

"I wish you'd have given me this written question ahead of time so I could plan for it...I'm sure something will pop into my head here in the midst of this press conference, with all the pressure of trying to come up with answer, but it hadn't yet...I don't want to sound like I have made no mistakes. I'm confident I have. I just haven't -- you just put me under the spot here, and maybe I'm not as quick on my feet as I should be in coming up with one." -after being asked to name the biggest mistake he had made, Washington, D.C., April 3, 2004

"The most important thing is for us to find Osama bin Laden. It is our number one priority and we will not rest until we find him." -Washington, D.C., Sept. 13, 2001

"I don't know where bin Laden is. I have no idea and really don't care. It's not that important. It's not our priority." -Washington, D.C., March 13, 2002

"I just want you to know that, when we talk about war, we're really talking about peace." -Washington, D.C. June 18, 2002

"I trust God speaks through me. Without that, I couldn't do my job." -to a group of Amish he met with privately, July 9, 2004

"I'll be long gone before some smart person ever figures out what happened inside this Oval Office." -Washington, D.C., May 12, 2008

"Rarely is the questioned asked: Is our children learning?" -Florence, South Carolina, Jan. 11, 2000

"If this were a dictatorship, it'd be a heck of a lot easier, just so long as I'm the dictator." -Washington, D.C., Dec. 19, 2000

"Too many good docs are getting out of the business. Too many OB-GYNs aren't able to practice their love with women all across this country." -Poplar Bluff, Mo., Sept. 6, 2004

There's also the classic Bush video where he flips off the camera:



And in an event that has exemplified our country's utter dislike of George W. Bush and his presidency, an Iraqi journalist throws a shoe at the President, and instead of rallying around our President, Americans mostly just thought it was really funny:



And if you want to be really confused, check out this video alternating clips of Bush in 1996 running for Governor of Texas, and Bush in 2006 as President of the USA. He used to be very articulate and intelligent by comparison:

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