Mind your business.

Wednesday, November 22, 2017

Net Neutrality Today. SOPA, PIPA, CISPA, ACTA, and PCIP Tomorrow!

Let's start off with an easy question:

Whose Internet would all of the cool, hip, California-smug, Obama-liberal/libertarian-lite, techno-pundits say is more "neutral?"

America's or China's?

A: China's right?

The Great Firewall of China

You see, there's nothing neutral about an Internet on the leash of state regulations.

Which is why "Net Neutrality" is as Orwellian a name for it as the Patriot Act is for that piece of unpatriotic trash.

Once you put on the leash, just so long as Washington is tugging it in the direction of your pet issue (this time, you fool)...

It doesn't matter if you give yourself a mile of leash. It will keep getting shorter until the state is yanking you around by the neck.

Net Neutrality activism is for people with short eyes and long ears. Sounds great to people who can't see past next week.

And people with short memories too.

Because when oh when will we ever learn that Washington "solutions" in search of a problem with the access to a valued good always end up making that good more expensive, not more accessible?

Washington says there's a problem with the access to housing, creates federal lending programs that target subprime borrowers, drives up housing prices, making them less affordable, and takes down half the economy as the first round of millennials graduate college for the grand finale.

Oh, speaking of college. Washington says there's a problem with the access to college, creates federal lending programs that target young and naive teenagers and their stupid parents, drives up university tuitions to truly scam levels, and saddles millennials with debt they'll be spending their lives paying off with a string of part time jobs at Starbuck's.

And what about health care? Washington says there's a problem with access to health care (yeah Washington was the problem all along), passes the Affordable Care Act... and big surprise: premiums and deductibles skyrocket to record highs. And young and healthy millennials end up paying more to cover the costs for Baby Boomers, the richest generation in history who use the services more and had their whole lives to save for it.

And millennials love Obama.

And Net Neutrality.

Are you all asleep or just as weak and stupid and naive as the Baby Boomers who mock you in major magazines say you are?

Anyway I just guarantee you that federal regulation that will ostensibly make the Internet more accessible and affordable, will somehow make it more expensive.

It's a law of physics at this point.

Here's another reason Net Neutrality is for people with short memories:

You federal government bootlickers may have already forgotten, but I remember everything, including our fights against:


Actively lobbying for federal intrusion into price-seeking between producers (e.g. Netflix) and shippers (i.e. ISPs) opens the door for more federal intrusion into the Internet.

Spoiler Alert: It won't be good.

You'll end up with a restricted and corrupted Internet for all that bootlicking.


Sounds overblown and melodramatic. Don't you think you're fear mongering a little bit?

Hey, I'm not the one telling you to start panicking like the Net Neutrality people plastering this all over the Internet:

We're talking about federal price-fixing regulations here, and they're acting like the seven seals on the apocalypse are about to break or some shit.


If you're not freaking out about...

Weapons of Mass Destruction in Iraq
Muslim Terrorists Targeting Your Toyota Camry Specifically
Wall Street Banks losing money on shady investments
An Army of Raping Hispanic Immigrants
West Nile Virus
Getting AIDS from Water Fountains
H1N1 Swine Flu
Violent Video Games
Reefer Maaaadness!
Marilyn Manson
North African Killer Bees

We're gonna need you to freak out, mmkay?"

"Yes, Mr. Congressman? When you get done sexually harassing
your office assistant today
, you NEED to look into Net Neutrality.
It's absolutely bananas out there!"

"Start freaking out" is almost always the clarion call of fascists who want to switch off your reasonable, forward-thinking cortex, and light up your scared, squirrel brain amygdala.

And if that's the way they have to get you to go along with them, then they're probably not looking out for your best interests.

But to answer the question:

What is so overblown or melodramatic about the fact that the U.S. federal government will do as much as it can get away with?

Here's something else you've shoved into the back of your mind and forgotten about:

They've been illegally spying on your Internet use like you're the enemy or something.

For years.

And pretty much we're all cool with it! Nobody's really that mad about it.

Meanwhile Edward Snowden's freezing his ass off in exile in Russia because he thought we might want to know.

You think the people burning the Middle East and Africa to the ground right now, killing civilians by the thousands in some of the world's poorest countries...

You think those guys have any scruples?

You think they have the moral authority to tell technology and media companies what and how to charge their customers?

You really don't think the power to do that poses a standing threat that they'll boss the Internet around in other ways?

You really want to align yourselves with the Empire and legitimize its authority by lobbying it for more intrusions into commerce?

You really don't think a hard line against any Washington regulation of the Internet is the right way to preserve and protect the Internet's freedom and neutrality?

If you do, please share this post:

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